History was made in sports on Monday night, Labor Day 2011, as the University of Maryland unveiled the worst uniforms in the history of sports.
The new helmets and shoulders are an exact takeoff of the Maryland state flag,
but the costumes look absolutely ridiculous. There was much twitter reaction to how bad they were, but the winner came from ESPN’s Jay Bilas, who wrote, “The 1970’s Houston Astros have just released a statement that they would not be caught dead in the new Maryland football uniforms.”
He’s right. College football has gone off the deep end. What teams like Oregon, Arizona State and Penn State (taking all white trim off their jerseys) are doing is an affront to the sports fan. I can actually handle the boredom and old-time nature of Penn State and Alabama, but Maryland allowed Under Armour to design their new uniforms without consent from the school, and they wound up with a disaster.
Maryland zooms to the top of an unsightly list of sports teams that dishonor what should be one of the glorious aspects of competition: Dressing to look your best in the competitive environment. Jerry Rice was anal about his jersey. It had to be perfectly fitted, perfectly put on, and perfect looking. From the helmet to the eye black to the shoulder pads, jersey, pants and shoes, he wouldn’t take the field until he looked in the mirror and looked pristine. As he said, “Look good, feel good. Feel good, play good.”
Rice couldn’t have done that it Maryland’s new duds. As a matter of fact, he couldn’t do it at the end of his career, when he wore one of the worst 10, the
Without further adieu, here are the 10 worst ever. I know you have some expectations, but the orange Tampa Bay Bucs and rainbow Houston Astros are not only among the worst, but among the best jerseys ever. Because we don’t have NBA, I’m not going to include that. This list is strictly from the sports we have locally, NFL, NHL, MLB, and college football and basketball. NBA and NCAA hoops get a pass.
10. Blues of the 90’s
What were they thinking? The Blues had one of the classiest jerseys with one of the best logos in all of sports, but during the Mike Keenan era they defiled it with this horrendous clown suit. No wonder Wayne Gretzky left.
9. Arizona Cardinals red on red
The Cardinals were my boyhood NFL team, and I still like them, and believe their helmet is the best in the league. But I can’t handle red-on-red. They should never do that.
8. Tampa Bay Buccaneers home
There’s nothing good about these. Bad helmet, bad color scheme, bad stripes. All bad. Cadillac Williams left for a reason.
7. Broncos home
I’m obviously not a fan of the monochrome look. The white pants are fine with these, but blue on blue? Uh uh. New Broncos coach John Fox announced soon after being hired that Denver will bring back orange. Fox says that in 2012, “You can put it in the bank” that Broncos will be wearing the orange jerseys full time at home.” Good for him.
6. Packers 1929 throwbacks
I refuse to believe that the Packers couldn’t come up with a better throwback than this one. The number on the front was stupid, the pants were hideous, and they’re the Green Bay Packers!!! Why were they wearing blue jerseys? Bad move. Bottom-10 move.
5. Now we’re getting to the all-time worst. This rest of the list is tough, but there is one reason Atlanta hockey fans are happy this fall. They don’t have to see this anymore…
These are jerseys for a pro hockey team? Clearly, fans weren’t going to show up to see a team wearing these. No way it would last. And, no way the next one does, either. The NHL made big mistakes with markets, and sweaters in these markets…
4 Nashville Predators baby poop green
‘nuff said, right? Who was going to like this?
3. The Seahawks jersey that Jerry Rice sported above, which is nearly tied with…
2. The Buffalo Bills calamity for the last decade or so…
NFL properties is a smart, creative group. How they came up with this is beyond me. And how someone in the Bills office agreed to it boggles the mind. Fortunately, Buffalo has made an outstanding switch for 2011…
And No. 1, the new champion …
Stupid. Who thinks this will work? Perhaps Under Armour thinks they’re marketing to a younger demographic, but my 17 year old son, who is a devotee of UniWatch and a jersey connoisseur, agrees that Maryland jumped the shark with this one.
I’m glad Mizzou has stayed true to the Black and Gold, and that the Illini are true to the Blue and Orange. The Blues reverted to one of the best jerseys in the league after their disaster. Locally, there aren’t many problems (aside from the Rams when they go blue on blue). Let’s hope it stays that way.